Tuesday, February 27, 2018

10 Pictures That Will Mess With Your Mind

Perspective is a weird and interesting thing, like the Penrose Triangle or the Infinite staircase. 



These are both made up but here are real life examples that your brain might not be able to handle.





This mural on the floor



Floor or Tunnel?


He has a tiny hand and the baby has a massive hand.


Lean back



This guy has no ankles



Plane landing on dry lake or flying over lake?


Gee beastly, whats happened to his head?


You cut my dog in half!





Monday, February 26, 2018

Swoveralls - The SweatPants/Overall Combo You Didn't Know You Wanted

There is a giant front pouch for a bottle of beer...err...a bottle for your baby?

 Swoveralls, a combination of two things you don't wear that you'll definitely want to wear. 




"Combining two of the most utilitarian apparel concepts developed in the modern era, The Great Fantastic Sweatpant Overalls are functional, cool, and extremely comfortable."



From Thrillist:
"The Swoverall which feels like the Snuggie's second cousin once removed, is currently available in two sizes and comes in grey and navy. The company will have a version designed for women hitting the store "very soon."
You could always go with the tracksuit look, but sweatpant overalls are a look that will make people ask, "What are you wearing?""







Monday, February 19, 2018

Stories from a Traveling Salesman - Part 3



"This was one of my first trips, out to Kansas State. Was there for a few days working, very nice group of people (and I guess one of the best vet schools in the nation.)
So when most people think "big college", where a big college is a Division 1 school like Kansas State, they usually think "big city".
Nuh uh. Not in this case.
Kansas State is in Manhattan, Kansas. It's a small city (50kish population), and it's in the middle of Kansas. Literally an hour from anything else besides cows and wheat. There's the university and... well, there's the university.
So I flew into the little airport in Manhattan, did my work, and was preparing to fly out in an evening. God had other plans.
There was a snowstorm a comin'. A big one. It was all over the radio, the news, Kansas was about to get hit in a manner of an hour or two.
Now I didn't really look forward to getting snowed into Manhattan, Kansas. No offense to any Manhattanites reading this, but I could think of a long list of places I'd like to spend a weekend, and Manhattan (KS) was near the bottom.
So the second my work was done, I drove as fast as possible to the airport, even though my flight wasn't due to depart for four hours or so. I wanted to get ahead of the weather, to get confirmation of what I knew was about to happen...
Sprinting up to the flight desk, I breathlessly asked.. "You guys are going to close the airport, aren't you. We're getting snowed in. You're going to cancel my flight, right?"
A few people gathered around the gate craned their necks in, eager to hear what she had to say.
The agent looked around at her sudden audience, pursed her lips, and nodded assent. "Yup, we're going to cancel it, pretty soon. You guys aren't going anywhere".
I turned away from the gate, cellphone in hand. I was NOT getting snowed in here. Called my boss immediately, I had already done my homework with the car rental agency.
"Hey boss. About to get snowed in in Kansas. Listen, the car rental company charges $100 to drop a car off at another airport, and my connecting flight is in Kansas City. Can I have permission to pay the... got it. Thanks boss, owe you one."
Now my audience hadn't all gone away. There was a soldier sitting there, sitting on his rucksack, listening to me talk to my boss.
"Hey buddy, my flight is connecting through Kansas City too. Can I score a ride?"
Now, it is verboten to take anyone, anywhere, for any reason when renting a car through my company. There's probably so many legal issues with it, can you blame them? But this was a soldier, he had to be cool. I wasn't going to strand this kid/guy here just for some liability crap no one would find out about anyway.
"Sure thing man, let's go".
As we sprinted back to the rental desk, the snow began to fall. And fall, and fall, and fall. We hurried out to the car, and peeled out of the lot, but Old Man Winter caught us.
I'm from Ohio. Not only am I from Ohio, I'm from Ohio in the lake effect region. I know snow. I live, breathe, and eat snow covered roads for months out of the year. I drive in it without a 2nd thought. Never been a problem for me.
Except for a Kansas blizzard. Fuck. that. noise. See here's the thing about Kansas. THERE'S NOTHING TO BLOCK THE WIND. So the snow doesn't fall down. It falls sideways. Plows can't do shit, and it's not like Ohio where eventually people wear ruts into the road down to the pavement through the snow. As soon as a car passed, the whole highway's snow was shifted 50 feet to the right, replaced with fresh snow from the prairie. Also, you couldn't see a damn thing.
So I'm white knuckle, going as fast as I dare, but I can barely even keep the car on the road, because I don't even know where the road is, it's just white. Everything is white.
Couple hours pass, we're getting past Topeka, heading east, but I keep glancing at the clock. We're not going to make it. And I just can't bring myself to go faster. Too scared. I confess my cowardice to my passenger.
"Hey I can drive, I drove truck for the Army".
Say what now? This guy is a professional? Army trained, ooo rah? I didn't even think twice. Pulled over, Chinese fire drill, slam the doors, GO GO GO.
And he took off like a bat out of hell. No fear in this guy, no hesitation. We were pushing 60,70,80, screaming down the snow covered freeway.
Through clenched teeth I asked him how often he drove in snow before.
"Oh I just drove truck in Afghanistan. And I'm from California, so I've never actually driven in the snow"
What.
The.
Fuck.
My jaw dropped, and I just stared at him. He was completely non-chalant, screaming down the highway in a crappy econo-rental Honda that weighs about 400 pounds empty, fighting against the wind blowing us off the road. (By far the most scared I was on the road, well except for that one night at the hotel in Phoenix, but that's another story)
But I wasn't going to look like a pussy in front of this kid. If he can do Afghanistan, I can sit in a car with him for another hour in freaking Kansas.
How we made it to Kansas City without wrecking I don't know. How we made it without me crapping my drawers is the real mystery. But we made it. Now I didn't make my flight, but happily, he made his, so in that way, it was worth it.
And if you're going to be snowed in somewhere, Kansas City isn't all that bad."


Stories from a Traveling Salesman - Part 2



"First things first, we have to get the setting correct. It's important to understand that we're talking about Dominica, not the Dominican Republic. The Dominican Republic is a relatively large Caribbean country that shares its island with Haiti. Dominica is another Caribbean Island, but it's very tiny, and much farther south.
So Dominica is not your usual Caribbean Island. It's not really on the cruise ship line stops, being so far south and so tiny, so it's not very touristy at all.
What is DOES have is a Medical School - Ross University (starting to see the common thread in my travels yet?). Caribbean medical schools, (if you're a Scrubs fan remember the Todd's school?), are the last resort of the sons of privilege to become a doctor, when their grades couldn't get them into any US schools. So you have a poor island, with rich kids (for the most part) attending their last resort med school there.
I was there for a week, doing my thing at the University, and then came my last evening on the island (thank God I had an afternoon flight out the next day, not the morning.)
Now the absolute coolest thing about Dominica was the outdoor bar(s). Imagine a shack, maybe 12x12, serving what is basically a giant outdoor patio. More of a party than a bar. Cheap as hell, delicious food from the Shacks (this food was the best food I've ever had on the road. Completely fresh, made from scratch local Caribbean food. Amazing. Well the best besides the Taco Bell in Boston, but that's another story) down the road, paradise. THAT's what made it the most fun at a bar, the company, the outdoor air, the setting, man it was amazing.
Now, it was usually my rule, being older and in a professional capacity, that I would do my fun time away from whatever university I was at. However, this time, I had to break that rule because:
1.) There was no where else to go. 2.) I didn't have a car, the university was responsible for getting me up the mountain to the airport. 3.) Heck with it, these are all grad students anyway, those aren't really kids.
So I whooped it up with the med students at the bar, like I was a kid again. The rum flowed like beer, and I was making friends left and right. These guys were probably starved for someone different to talk to as well. Imagine if you were stuck on an island with that was made up of your high school and some locals and that's it. No one else would ever come. You'd probably be more than happy to party with someone new, even if they were some lame 30 year old.
Anyway, I got way too inebriated, and ended up going to a house party up the hill. Then I specifically remember outlasting most of the kids, but staying up with 2 or 3 in particular late late into the night, swapping back and forth funny YouTube videos we knew about, laughing until our sides ached. By far the best "one night" friends I ever made."




"Ever get something in your head, and then told you can't have it? Ever have it nag on you, and nag on you, and you're just incredulous that something is impossible, and you want it so bad, but "nope, can't have it?". It's not even something that good, but once you're told you can't have it...
So I was in Boston (Boston University this time) for a week, and all set to head back to Ohio on Saturday morning. I actually had a childhood friend who emigrated to Boston before high school, so I was anxious to catch up with him, have a nice dinner, go out after and get a little stupid, you know the drill.
So we agree to meet up on Friday night. My hotel was back around the University, but I took a cab down to meet him in the Mission Hill area, and we had dinner and went out for drinks.
As the night went on, a few hours later, I told my friend "man I could go for a Cheesy Gordita Crunch, I think I'll hit up a Taco Bell on the way back to the hotel".
"Oh, there aren't any in Boston. You can't.", he replied.
Wut.
Now, I don't know if you guys knew this about Boston, but he's right. Check this crap out: https://www.google.com/maps/search/taco+bell/@42.3195444,-71.1017217,13z
(I don't know how you people in Boston live, seriously. No wonder you're so angry about sports all the time. I'd be angry too without delicious tacos)
No Taco Bell? "Impossible" I thought. "Has to be a lie." And the thought wormed into my brain as my friend and I drank and talked the night away. It festered as I paid my bill. It exploded into full denial as I hailed a cab.
Now this is what you have to know about my job back then. I had a company credit card, and we had a strict $65 per day per diem, for food. Any of my stories where I'm acting the fool, I'm doing it on my own dime. But remember... the per diem was for food... not, well, cab fare...
"I want to go to Taco Bell, then back to Boston University" I slurred towards the driver.
"No Taco Bells in Boston" grunted the cabbie. (Seriously Boston, get your shit together)
"I know. Take me to the closest one".
At this point, the cabbie turned around and regarded me, raising one eyebrow in unspoken question. "That'll be quite the trip" he remarked.
I waggled my company card in the dome light. "Don't worry, I'm good for it".
So that's the story of my 84 dollar cab fare to get Taco Bell, which as I said in my previous story, was the best food I've ever had on the road. There's no better spice for food than to tell a drunk person he can't have it. Well I had it that night, and it was pure ambrosia. Luckily, the company accounting department never questioned the cab fare (pretty much one of the dumbest things I've ever done on the road, except for the Kansas Drive, but that's another story) and I got away with my 100 dollar meal (ordered some for the cabbie too).
Man that Gordita was good."

Stories from a Traveling Salesman


Life on the road must be tough and if you've ever seen Trains, Planes and Automobiles, you know what can happen when you travel for a living. The best upside are the stories you'll be able to tell. 

Here are a few stories from a Reddit User that everyone loved hearing about. 



 

"Back in my traveling days, I was working with a coworker a few years back, and we were in LA for the week. We were done for the day, and wanted to go grab a quick bite and some drinks, so when we saw a Magic Johnson TGI Fridays, we stopped in.
Honestly, it was about 15 minutes in before we realized we were the only white people there, but I'll tell you what. I've traveled a lot, and I've never felt more welcomed into a place (besides Duluth, that's another story) by the patrons/bartenders than we were at that TGI Fridays. I had like three conversations going on with the people around me, it was absolutely fantastic. Wonderful few hours."

"So another time on the road, this time I was working with people at the University of Minnesota - Duluth campus. Much like the previous story, it was my last evening in town, and as I usually do, I go out (by myself this time) for a decent dinner and a few brews, cabbing it back to the hotel.
Let me preface this story by saying I'm a football and baseball guy. I watch basketball occasionally, but I know nothing, nothing about hockey save for playing it on my Super Nintendo back in the day and using a dump the puck glitch to score like 100 goals in a game, but I digress..
So I'm at some sports bar in Duluth, local-owned place, and I'm polishing off my 2nd beer, happily burping up the remnants of my burger, and watching ESPN. Order the third beer, start sipping, and become aware that the bar seems to be filling up around me.
More people come in. Then more, and more, and more. Bar, which an hour ago had maybe 15 souls in it, was filled to bursting. I couldn't even move my stool back.
So that night the Minnesota Wild were in the playoffs, and the bar was PACKED. The four guys around me "adopted" me for the night, explaining the game, exchanging high fives, talking and telling stories during commercials, and for that one glorious evening, I became a Wild fan. I've honestly never had so much fun at a bar (except Dominica, but that's another story) as I did that night with my four "one-night" buddies, hooting and hollering, screaming and cheering, glued to the TV.
Unfortunately, the Wild lost that night, but it did nothing to dampen our spirits, and we drank and laughed for a couple hours after the game ended, and I eventually stumbled on out to my cab. Great guys. I've never been a hockey fan before, or since, but that one night, damn I loved me some NHL."







Friday, February 16, 2018

Red Stripe Beer Company Rescues Jamaican Bobsleigh Team

The coach of the women's Jamaican bobsleigh team wasn't feeling the rhythm threw a fit and left with the teams sled, leaving them unable to compete. 

This all happened days before the women were scheduled to compete in the winter Olympics in Pyeongchang

Amazingly, Red Stripe, the Jamaican beer company, stepped in to save the day by buying the team a new sled. 



In a comment below the original tweet, the Jamaican team accepted the offer.
Later speaking to the Gleaner, JBSF president Chris stokes said: “We have been gifted a bobsled from Red Stripe. We have accepted their generosity and we are currently preparing the sled.
“The team is in competition mode and we are focused on one goal – coming to the start line prepared mentally and physically. We have had some challenges in Pyeongchang, but we stand united and thank our fans and colleagues for their unwavering support”.
A new sled will reportedly set the beer company back £5,000.
Former coach Kiriasis quit her position after refusing to change roles from driving coach to track performance analyst, which she said would have given her no access to the athletes.
She told media in Pyeongchang: “The athletes have told me they don’t understand why this has happened as they have no problem with me and we have a good relationship”.

Get on up, it's bobsled time!


Life Hacks - ReUse a Yoga Mat


  1. Use cookie cutters to cut the mat into holiday ornaments
  2. Cut down for placemats for pet dishes. Keeps the area neat while also prevents the dishes from sliding around
  3. Clean the mat well and use it to line kitchen shelves
  4. Use the mat to smother weeds in your garden.
  5. Instead of buying a rug pad, use an old yoga mat (or two) to keep your rug in place. Rug pads also make vacuuming your rug easier.
  6. Instead of packing peanuts, wrap pieces of a yoga mat around your valuables.
  7. Strips of old yoga mat make colourful stair treads.
  8. Use a piece as a welcome mat outside a kitty litter box. The mat's stickiness grabs the litter off paws preventing it from spreading throughout the rest of the house and protects kitty's paws as well
  9. Cut into rounds and use as coasters
  10. Cut a piece to use as a sunshade in your parked car when it gets really hot
For another 40 ideas, click here.



Thursday, February 15, 2018

BrideZilla Stories



Relax on your wedding day, if it doesn't go perfect don't sweat it, you'll still have a good time.

Pro Tip: Have your wedding at the Ritz Carlton like I did. NOTHING, I mean NOTHING will go wrong unless it's your own fault...

-Oh, you have food allergies, let me get 3 chefs to come talk to your about our food.
-As soon as the groom walks into the building: "Sir let me take those up to your room for you."
-Jokingly say you should have two giant throne like chairs at your little sweetheart table...goes out of the way to find two of the biggest fucking chairs in the hotel and puts them at the table.
-There are 2 little kids at your wedding, boom chicken fingers served without anyone even asking.
-If you didn't have time for cake, here are 4 pieces and a bottle of champagne on a tray in your room.


Anyway here are the stories of brides acting badly.

"Florist- We had a bride and her mother show up at 9am. They wanted to order a bridal bouquet, a mother of the bride cattelya orchid corsage, a boutonniere for the groom, and six smaller ones for the groomsmen. The wedding was scheduled for noon. Yep, three hours from then, and they wanted them ready by the time they were done with thier makeup appointment at the beauty parlor a few doors down. The bride was flipping through the FTD sample book and pointing out the style and flowers she wanted. Think garden roses with long sweeping trails of stephanotis and variegated ivy, all three of which would require at least a week's advanced order with our suppliers. She was absolutely gobsmacked that we didn't carry extremely expensive and highly perishable flowers at all times. Same with the catteleya orchid for the mom's corsage. My boss told them that since they didn't place an order beforehand they would be limited to what we had in stock, and simple styles that could be assembled quickly. The bride and her mom kept pointing at the book and arguing that we should have those specific flowers in stock. My boss eventually took the book off the desk and tossed it behind the counter.
The bride vacillated between tears and petulant whining that we were going to ruin her big day. My boss, who had a bone deep loathing for brides in general, told her she had ruined her own day by not ordering her flowers before her actual wedding day. The mom tried chewing out my boss for her lack of customer service skills. My boss told her that she was welcome to go down the street to Vons and ask their flower department to make their order with whatever they had in stock. The mom said she'd do just that, and reassured the bride that she'd have her flowers done by the time her appointment was over. Both women stormed out.
I figured that was that, but my boss told me and the other girl to start on six simple dendrobium orchid bouts. Meanwhile she threw together a ribbon wrapped bridal bouquet with some white roses that were nearly past their prime and some more dendros. Sure enough, twenty minutes later the MoB slunk back in and meekly asked if we were still able to assemble what they needed. We did. We also charged her a very large bitch tax- ahem, rush fee."


"My mom and I saw a great bridezilla freak out while shopping for my wedding dress a few years back. We were in a small, local shop when another mother-daughter duo came in. The attendant who had been helping us went up to greet them. The mother said they were here to pick up her daughter's dress, so the attendant looks her name up in the computer, frowns, and says, "Ma'am, you never bought the dress."
"What are you talking about?"
The attendant shows the lady the notes on her computer screen. "You said you wanted to think about it, and asked if we could hold the dress. We held it for two weeks, but when we didn't hear back from you, we assumed you didn't want it."
"Well, we want it now."
"It's been over eight months", the attendant explained, "We sold the dress a long time ago. But I can order you another one, and have it expedited here in a few weeks."
And like a Mt. St. Helens of entitlement, the eruption began. "This is unacceptable!" The mother shrieked. "We have her alterations scheduled in two hours! The wedding is a week away! I can't believe you sold her dress!" The bride, meanwhile, is slumped against the desk and sobbing like someone killed her dog.
My mom and I are just open-mouthed staring at this point. The attendant was trying to be diplomatic, but is clearly as baffled as we are. "Ma'am, we had no way to know you wanted it. You never called. You never put down a deposit. The dress isn't yours until you pay for it."
After some more screaming from the mother and wailing from the bride, they left. The shop attendant came back over to us and I asked her, "Does that kind of thing happen a lot?"
The poor lady just deflated. "All the time."
It baffles me to this day. How do you schedule alterations on a dress that you never purchased? Why would you wait until a week before the wedding to pick up your dress? How do you make it to adulthood without knowing how basic buying and selling transactions work?"


"I worked at David’s Bridal and I have to say that I never really had a terrible bride. It was always the moms, grandmas, sisters and friends that were terrible. Either they hated what the bride would pick out for them to wear or they would hate what she was picking out for herself to wear. At DB we have kinda strict appointment guidelines when it comes to time and a lot of brides that would bring entourages wouldn’t find a dress because everyone would bombard her with their opinions and overwhelm them.
The worst thing I’ve ever witnessed was when a bride that always struggled with her weight came in. She was overweight and had been working extremely hard on it over the last year. It was a slower day and we all loved her story and wanted to make that day special so we all decided to help. She finally found a dress that she loved and she started crying along with most of us. Then she looked at her mom and asked for her opinion and her mom looked at her and said “you look fat in it”. We all stood there in silence and the bride lost her happiness. She asked to be assisted in taking it off and they left.
It was one of the saddest days that I had experienced there."


"I worked at a mom/pop shop. We had a bride who was polish, who my boss called 'polish princess', she wasn't my bride but they picked a very bad consultant for her. Made worse by the fact that this girl wanted stuff added to her dress that wasnt done by the manufacture so we had to do it all in house. To give you an example, she wanted lights, those tube lights? I think that's what they are called, all around the bottom half of a dress that we had already spliced with two different dresses.
Side note: my boss loved anything that meant money.
Anywho, we spent months fixing and refitting this dress because she not only lost 45lbs from her first time being measured, which brought her 4 dress sizes less than her original, she also got a massive boob job, bruskia. Well, after finally fitting her into her gown, on the last week she decided the lights that took our poor 70 year old seamstress two months to sew in, looked tacky. She was crying and throwing herself at her mother in a tantrum, screaming in polish all this crazy shit. She ripped the bottom of the dress and ultimately had to buy a dress from David's bridal because my boss finally got smart and kicked her out. Just a mess. She made our seamstress cry!!!!!"


"Oh I work as a wedding server, awesome job I love it. As soon as someone says bridezilla this one story where the manager of our hotel had to shut down the wedding halfway through comes to mind. This was the bridezilla of all the bridezillas I've ever seen.
There were a lot of little things leading up that were casual bridezilla until the wedding took a sharp turn. At one point she accused the wedding server staff of stealing her veil... then the manager found it in her room and also showed her the card swipes to her room proving only she had been in the room that day.
About 20 minutes later she was screaming at some poor front desk employee accusing her of stealing her wedding boots. Manager intervened and after a long talk the photographer told them he had a photo of the boots on the staircase of the church, and asked if she had worn them since... when she said no she told our place it was our job to have picked them up and made sure she had them (the church was not related to our place at all).
THEN shortly after she started opening the wedding gifts frantically inside the ballroom and screaming at anyone and everyone, guests included, saying someone stole her wedding certificate.
After that , our manager gathered the wedding staff and told us to take off our uniform jackets, Empty them in front of him, then to clock out and go home. Which we all did, none of us stole anything , and we heard next day the maid of honor had the certificate and after we left the wedding was shut down completely. Room left as is for the bride to come back to in the morning."



"I work at a hotel that does a huge amount of wedding business, and we had an engagement shower with the plan being that the couple would be having the wedding with us as well. This involved the bride-to-be and to an extent, her mother.
Anyways, we knew there were going to be issues because neither the bride or groom ever smiled. She was always complaining about how he was "wishy-washy" with picking a date and he was always silent. The MOB was your stereotypical Brooklyn Jewish Mother and had her hand in EVERYTHING to make sure things were perfect for her little princess. (My experience has shown that the MOB/MOG are exponentially worse than the actual people getting married.)
Well, the engagement party starts, and everyone, except for the couple, seem to be having a great time. Then, halfway through the party, we suddenly heard the girl scream at her fiancee "WE WILL NEVER HAVE A CHRISTMAS TREE IN MY HOUSE, SO YOU CAN GET OVER IT!!!!"
And from there it devolved into a shouting match between the couple, who moved from the banquet room to the lobby so their "guests" couldn't hear the argument. (Didn't work. They heard everything.)
Apparently she was Jewish and he was Protestant and not once in their relationship had they discussed religion. They went at it on and off for two hours. She was screaming at the top of her lungs about how their (non-existent) children would be raised Jewish, and how his traditions didn't matter. Her mother standing at her side and nodding in agreement and interjecting occasionally with a "that's right" or "you tell him".
He was pleading (in a good attempt to be quiet, but was obviously frustrated) for her to at least compromise to let him at least invite his pastor from his home town for the wedding, and that their (non-existent) children could possibly do things with his parents for Christmas, even if they didn't celebrate.
The guests just kept partying, pretending nothing was happening, but you could see on all of their faces that they wanted to leave, but couldn't since they would have to pass by the couple to get to the only exit.
Only after two hours and the argument eventually devolving in to her INSISTING her children would never see a Christmas tree in their whole lives so they wouldn't be confused (good luck with that one in this country, lady) the groom finally, dejectedly said "Well then maybe this isn't going to work."
She threw her ring at him and said, (I swear to god) "THEN WHY THE HELL DID YOU LET ME MAKE YOU PROPOSE?!?!?!?!?!?!" She then changed her mind, picked up the ring and said "Whatever. I'm keeping this." and stormed off. Her mother looked at her ex-potential-son-in-law, told him he was an idiot for letting her baby go, and went after her.
I've NEVER seen a banquet room clear of people so fast. Within fifteen minutes, everyone was gone, and it was a ghost town, and from the looks of it, everyone took their "Gifts" with them.
Worse still, it was the former-bride's family who had hosted and were staying at the hotel, so we spend the next two days "commiserating" with them about how awful the groom was as they moved their daughter out of his apartment.
Dude dodged a bullet."





"Baker here. I wasn't present for the freak out, but it was my fault so...
A few months back, I had a bride who wanted a Navy to white ombre cake (something like this ) made with white sponge. Now, dark, rich colors like that in white cake fucking suck. they always taste terrible because they have so much gel coloring in them to get them right. However, you can do it, if they're willing to have the dark layers be chocolate. Navy is especially easy, thanks to blue velvet. I tell her this when we're planning. "But I want white cake!" I tell her I'll do all but the last few in white sponge. She agrees, and I make the damn thing and drop it off.
I come back to pick up the staging stuff the next day, only to find my whole fucking cake sitting there.
Apparently when they cut into the thing and fed it to each other, she freaked out over it being chocolate, and refused to let any of the cake be served. Apparently she forgot that she had agreed to have the bottom tier have two layers of blue velvet, so she threw a massive fucking temper tantrum over 'the cake being wrong' and how I ruined her wedding, then locked herself in the bridal suite. if she wouldn't have been a little psychopath and let the staff cut the cake like they should have, she would've seen that 90% of the cake was white sponge like she wanted."