When Twitter only allowed 140 characters it was hard to tell a story or get your point across. Now that they've doubled that number to 280 characters, we get these brilliant gems.
My coworker told me he got banned from a bar when he lived in North Dakota back in 1973 and didn’t try going back to it for 30 years but he finally did and the moment he stepped in someone yelled “Get the hell out of here Dennis” And that’s probably my favorite story ever— Brennan (@Bmangall20) December 13, 2017
13 years ago I ordered an m&m blizzard at Dairy Queen and the lady who took my order screamed “ONE SMALL M&M BLIZZARD!!!” at the top of her lungs then immediately turned around and started making it herself and it’s still the funniest thing that has ever happened to me— hannah sorrell (@hannahkimberlee) December 8, 2017
In my 6th grade science class a girl read "orgasm" instead of "organism" and the class laughed & she was embarrassed. To calm her down our teacher told her everyone would forget in two weeks. It's been 9 years & I still remember Danielle. I fucking remember. I hope you see this. pic.twitter.com/gCXcXbJX2i— wes (@sewkx) January 6, 2018
My roommate went on a bumble date and was nervous so decided to pound shots in her car once she got to the place they were meeting and the guy was parked next to her and watched her chug vodka for 5 minutes.— Syd (@s_kerekes) December 21, 2017
Dating is rough.
one time I stumbled into Waffle House ridiculously drunk and the waitress gave me free food and water till I sobered up, made sure I wasn’t driving and that my friend would take me someplace I’d be safe. It’s not a Waffle House, issa Waffle Home. https://t.co/tQZaGUIUXd— IT Bae (@ICVRUS) January 5, 2018
So they changed my gate in my layover and I ask the employee what the gate changed too. I showed her my screenshotted ticket and she looked at me strange and just ask me where I was going. I told her and then looked at my phone to realize I was actually showing her this pic.twitter.com/ZvfqV4p4yn— Jordan ☀👀 (@TheRavenousDyke) December 29, 2017
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