Hilarious Mark Zuckerberg Congressional Testimony Memes

In case you live under a rock, everyone is pissed at Facebook for sharing all their users data...mainly because they think it helped get Trump elected. You should be mad at yourself for not opting out of the data collection and taking all those stupid INTJ personality quizzes. Anyway, yesterday Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg was questioned before congress and since the internet think he's a robot they created memes...here are the best ones. 



Lt. Commander Zuck in court after his plan to study humans in greater detail backfires

Mark using his Big Boy Booster Seat

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Two Easy Woodworking Gift Ideas

Everyone knows about tic tac toe. All you need is a block of wood cut into a square and a drill. I used some dowels which I painted different colors but you can also use golf tees, nails or even bullet shell casings. 

The second gift may be slightly less well known but if you've ever been to Cracker Barrel, on in my case my grandparents house, you're probably familiar with the triangle peg game. 

Here is a template for drilling out the holes... You may need to resize the image.

And here is a video of the build process

Las Vegas Life Hacks - You can still get free drinks!

Sin City, VEGAS BABY! What happens in Vegas, Stays in Vegas...except for these tips...

It's not as easy to get upgraded in Las Vegas as it used to be and more and more casinos have been cutting back on the free drinks. Here are a few ways to go to Vegas and "game" the system.

- While playing a table game at a casino, secretly pocket some of your own chips so that when you color out, the pit boss marks you down as losing more money than you actually did, and spending more money gets you more comps. 
Keep in mind the dealers do have an idea of how much you actually lost so you can’t go crazy with it. Also if they catch you doing it more than once, they will tell the pit boss about it. It’s not illegal or anything to take your own chips off your stack, but they don’t like people trying to lie about how much they won or lost. When you’re done at the table, ask to color out and the dealer will exchange your chips for higher denomination ones so they’re easier for you to hold/carry. They then call the pit boss over to look at the chips and make sure the dealer exchanged for the right amount. This is when the pit boss sees what you’re walking away with and marks down how much you won or lost.

- When you leave a table, always cash your chips in at the cage before going to another table and then buy in with cash again at the new table so it appears that you are spending more. In the casinos eyes, if you sit down at a new table with chips from another table, then you’re not spending more money, just the same money at a different table. You want it to look like you’re spending a lot. The pit boss keeps track of how much you are buying in for each time you sit down at a table (you always give them your players card when you sit down so they can put the info on your account.)They also keep track of how much you are wagering per hand, but in my opinion it’s not worth it to wager more than you’re comfortable with just to increase your comps. You could end up losing a LOT more money than what the comps will be worth.

- It’s becoming more and more common for casinos in Vegas to charge for parking, but parking is free for people in the higher tiers of the players club. People accidentally leave their players club cards in slot machines, and if you can find a higher tier card someone lost you can use it at the parking ticket machine for free parking. For a more ethical version, simply ask someone if they can get an extra copy of their card made for you to use for this purpose. It’s easy to get a card made up and many people have 2 or more. You can’t do anything else with it without knowing their PIN so it’s pretty harmless. You can also google which casinos offer free parking and see if there’s one within walking distance to your destination.

No, that isn't the stock market...

- If you want to watch a game or otherwise hang out in the sports book but don’t want to pay ridiculous drink prices, find out what their policy is for complimentary drinks for the people betting on horses. A sports bet will get you one comp drink voucher, but many casinos have a policy where horse players get free drinks without needing to use the drink vouchers. (This has something to do with horse betting being parimutuel; the casino makes money whether you win or lose. Horse players also tend to spend a lot of money going to the window and betting before each race, sometimes multiple tracks at once.) Sit in the horse betting area, turn your little personal TV to a racing channel, get a racing program and find some losing wager tickets someone left around so it looks like you’re betting horses and enjoy free drinks. You’ll be able to see the sports from that area too. You may have to place a bet on a race once in a while to keep the facade going, but it’s still cheaper than paying full price for the drinks (minimum bet on a horse race is $2). You would also get a free drink voucher when you make the bet; if you ask politely they might give you two of them. And who knows, maybe your horse will win ;)

- In Craps it’s not really unethical, but you’re kind of seen as a jerk if you bet the don’t pass line because you’re betting against the shooter. I don’t play craps often, but the way I see it is that they wouldn’t have the craps table if it wasn’t a money maker, so the majority of people must be losing at least some money. If you do the opposite of the majority maybe you’ll do better? I’ve found that when a shooter is hot but then something happens to delay their roll, like the dice go off the table or something, they seven out on the next roll. So that’s when I’d bet the don’t pass. Is this just me being superstitious? yeah probably.

- When you’re playing a slot machine or table game, cocktail waitresses come around and serve complimentary drinks. If you want a mixed drink, such as vodka and cranberry, ask for one vodka and one cranberry and then mix them together yourself as they are quite stingy on the liquor in the comp mixed drinks. Tip your cocktail waitress well; it will ensure your drinks get to you quickly. Plus those poor women have to deal with a lot of drunk assholes all day and it’s just a nice thing to do. Besides, a buck or two is still a lot cheaper than if you’d have paid full price for the drink.



- If you’re trying to raise enough tier points to get to a higher level players card (free parking!) without actually spending money, you could have the players club desk print you a bunch of copies of your card and stick them into a couple slot machines and hope the next person to sit down and play one doesn’t take it out to put their own card in. You’ll get the points for all the money they spend in the machine. Go for the “trendy” newer slots like the walking dead themed one, the Simpsons one, game of thrones, etc. Those machines tend to have higher minimum bets and will therefore accumulate the points quicker. They also tend to be played more by tourists rather than regulars/locals, and the locals are more likely to take your card out and put their own in. 

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Woman Sues After Martha’s Vineyard Rental Home Was Used To Shoot Pornography

A Massachusetts woman has filed a federal lawsuit accusing her tenant of using her Martha’s Vineyard home to shoot pornographic videos without telling her.

Bassett says the filmmakers used “nearly every room of her home for their porn production purposes,” including her bedrooms, sofas, dining room table and laundry room appliances.


She likely became aware of the incident as an employee of the tenant was fired from the production and emailed the owner that he wouldn't be paying rent. She (the owner) had her parents check on the place, and found it was in a "deplorable state of condition." They also found some people unpacking gear.

You would think that anyone who rents their homes out and would expect people to have sex all over the place. I understand not wanting the inside of your home to be filmed and put on the internet, but if you rent out your home, sex is going to happen inside the house...so make sure you wipe down those kitchen counters before using them the next time you rent a house at the beach.